Personal Essay: Walking away with more than a diploma, finding your niche at Mary Washington

by CARLOS NUNES

Staff Writer

When I first stepped on campus as a freshman, I felt completely out of place. Where was the excitement everyone talked about? I didn’t feel it. I struggled to find my people, connect with my classes or feel like I belonged. Honestly, I couldn’t wait to leave. Now three years later, I’m graduating early, not because I rushed to escape but because along the way, everything changed. 

In those early days, the whole college experience was overwhelming. The campus felt huge, the classes were intimidating and it seemed as if everyone had already found their friend groups and routines. I wasn’t sure if Mary Washington was the right school for me, and there were days when I seriously considered transferring. All these overwhelming thoughts that made me feel so isolated eventually made me realize that I wasn’t the only one feeling this way. 

Through conversations with other students, I learned that many people were struggling to adjust, even if they didn’t show it. Slowly, I began to understand that finding your place in college takes time and effort. It wasn’t about having the perfect freshman year or instantly fitting in, it was about being patient with myself to grow and adapt. 

“UMW became my home when I met my best friends and boyfriend,” said senior marketing major Nya Lloyd. “They have not only had my back during hard times and been a shoulder to cry on, but they have shared some of my favorite memories. They have truly made UMW a great experience and a place I can call home.”

That understanding led me to a turning point. At the University of Mary Washington, I realized that the key to making college feel like home was getting involved in things that genuinely mattered to me. Instead of trying to blend into the crowd or join the clubs that everyone else seemed to be part of, I looked for organizations that aligned with my values and passions. I started attending UMW traditions and it was not long before I met people who shared similar beliefs. The relationships I built weren’t just surface-level connections. They were with people who understood me, who challenged me and who made me feel like I had a place here.

“UMW became my home once I found my people, it made me feel safe and included,” said senior psychology major Paige Strycker. 

The more I focused on following my own interests, the more I found that Mary Wash had a community waiting for me. I just needed to stop trying to fit into spaces that didn’t feel right. Shifting my focus from “fitting in” to “finding where I belong.” It wasn’t about trying to match everyone else’s journey, it was about creating my own, right here on this campus. 

Setting goals became my anchor when college felt like too much to handle. I focused on small, personal wins, getting through tough classes and joining clubs that excited me which gave me a sense of progress. My friends and mentors were everything, always there to lift me up when I started to doubt myself. Their support, along with the goal of graduating early, gave me the push I needed to stay focused. It wasn’t just about finishing quickly, it was about proving to myself that I could overcome the struggles and come out stronger. 

As I stand on the brink of graduation, I realize that my journey wasn’t about rushing to the finish line, it was about transforming along the way. From the freshman who wanted to transfer, to the senior who found his place, I’ve learned that the path to success isn’t always straight or easy, but it’s always worth it. I’m now walking away not just with a diploma, but with friendships, memories and a sense of purpose I never thought I’d find.